Saturday, December 26, 2009

Liquor consumption in Kerala on X-Mas day!!!

A friend of mine, had mentioned in his facebook update that the state of Kerala sold 28 crores worth of liquor on Xmas day. So here I was, sitting idle, waiting for another friend to go to the movie Avatar in iMax 3D. Which meant I had a little time to kill, so I did a little math, which goes somewhat like this -

Starting Official figure: 280m
So including all the bars and toddy shops etc, the unofficial figure should hover somewhere around 130% of that: approx - 360m(I feel 30% is still a very small figure, thinking of all the toddy shop-scenes in Mallu movies. The soul of Kerala lives in those toddy shops, literally, If you know what I mean..)

Population of Kerala - Around 32m

Male population(Hmm.. we still frown upon females who drink!) approx - 15m (thanks to the superior sex ratio)
Which got me thinking. Look at the development indices, and we are somewhere up there among the most developed nations. But mention a female who enjoys a drink or two to a mallu guy, and a series of lewd jokes would follow, most of which would make even a tough woman like, say, Sharon Stone in Basic Instincts, to run for cover in her mother's womb!

But I digress. Back to statistics.

Considering an ever dwindling birth rate, lets assume 75% of that is adult population - 11.25m
Of which, maybe 5%(Still very ambitious) are the rare and endangered species in Kerala called the teetotalers, so we're left with approx 11m

And maybe 5% of the most influential members in this group is not in Kerala(including yours truly), so remaining - 10.5m. (If you start converting all those Riyals and Dinars and Dollars into Rupees, you'll start wondering how a recession could ever have happened!)

Considering statistical errors and other situational factors (like the wifey getting unreasonably fussy(that could be dealt later) or unreasonably romantic(that could not) on the XMas eve...), am rounding it off to 10m(also for ease of calculation).

Which means that on an average, every single Malayalee with hair on his chest (and otherwise), spent abt 36 Rs on alcohol. If you consider the price of XXX Rum in Kerala(Assuming that's still the most popular brand) - Abt 255 Rs for 750ml,thats roughly about 2 large shots of rum per Mallu gut!

Did anyone check the happiness indices in Kerala recently? For me, surely thats one happy lot! Definitely after those 2 'large's went in!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

First fall in my life

"Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower" - Albert Camus

Everyone had warned me about it. I had seen pictures of it. I had read about it. So I thought I was prepared, with my camera. I had framed my shots mentally, even found captions for it. I monitored foliage news constantly, and planned trips around the fall-peak. But finally, when it came, I was so overwhelmed, like a kid who forgot the first lines to utter on the stage. All my carefully charted out plans suddenly seemed like a chaotic mix of things to do which was not important at all. Maybe for the first time, I felt as if my camera is totally useless in my hands. The pictures I took screamed of my ineptitude. The plans, though executed, seemed hardly appropriate, or meaningless in the grand scheme of things. I was simply blown away by the beauty of fall.

Finally, I decided to relieve some stress from myself. I told myself, it's okay if you cant capture it all, it's OK to feel frustrated to see a long line of trees, glowing in the evening sun in bright yellow orange and red, while you are unable to stop by and take a picture. Maybe its all part of the feeling that is 'fall': that beauty is so ephemeral, that we're never capable enough to scour down all the beauty that we see around us. Just dont forget to cast a passing glance at something beautiful, and that flashing image will create such an elaborate and vivid imagery in your memory, and that's often more than enough!

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Read this if you want (me) to make money for free!!!

I did a remarkable thing today.

I 'monetized' my blog. Like many of you, I didn't know what the hell that means. But fortunately, our brains and eyes are hardwired to cling on to anything that has the letters M-O-N-E in it. Even if the 'Y' is absent. Wow, I just made a super-cool statement! Good start!

Bottomline, I signed up for google's adsense. So If I am smart enough to make a few people come read my blog, and they are prudent enough to click on any of those links, and a few and then a lot many of such clicks happen, google will send money to me! By the time I finished writing that, it has already started to sound like a bummer! What do I write, that millions of others cant write about? I have had many starts with this blog in the past, and many false starts too. By far, the most successful streak has been the time when I started it, when we had a bunch of friends who had time at their disposal, and I used to be a very active member in blogger cicrles. Means, I used to read and comment on other blogs, and they used to return the favor, even maybe in an obligatory sense. I used to track the traffic in my page, check for comments every hour etc etc.

But now, who has got time? From my own experience, my attention span has dwindled to at least 10-20% of what it has been in the last 4-5 years. I cannot even make myself sit and read a full article on Time.com now. Gosh, now I see myself in a supernatural status when I recollect that I studied and passed ME 305 - Metallurgy and Material Sciences, about seven years ago! In any given 5 minute break during work, I browse the entire spectrum of NYTimes, Time, Manorama, TimesOfIndia, Deals2Buy, Twitter, Orkut, Facebook, and Berlytharangal.com, not necessarily in that order. Given that scenario, who's got time to read a blog which is 2 pages long, and talks about one person's constrcited view of the world? When we have actors, sportsmen, scientists, and even politicians blogging and twittering like mad out there! The question is, would you rather follow Priyanka Chopra or me?

All that said, I am going to try and see. I dont care much about the money. Not like I dont care about money at all, but am pretty sure its not big money that I need to really care about. This is an experiment with my own ability. To see If I can make people read my blog. From a probable starting readership of one (which is my wife, that too if I promise her something really nice) to maybe a few hundreds in a few months. And, in the process, If I can make money out of this. Believe me, thats just secondary. And I am pretty sure, wont happen any sooner to make me lose sleep over, thinking what to do with it!